Did a Celebrity Matchmaker Influence the next Star Wars Movie?

Originally published at: yourtango.com
Photo credit by: YOURTANGO

Cristina Conti Pineda’s original manuscript revealed.

From my recent barrage of Star Wars articles, Instagram posts @MatchmakerCristinaConti, and dating advice @MatchmakersInTheCity, I may have attracted the attention of Disney executives attempting to bolster the new movie with realistic romance.  As a Celebrity Matchmaker, I love helping our members create their own love story, and below, find a sneak peek into my vision for Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker out in theaters this December 19th.
 

Potential spoiler alert: this article could contain material from the film if my recommendations come to fruition.  However, this should only help you to enjoy the movie; I doubt that they would have used my entire story, and you can decide which version contains the healthiest relationships!
 

Now, start playing the John Williams Star Wars theme song in your mind, and imagine the opening crawl disappearing on a black, starry background:

 

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...


Episode IX
 

THE RISE OF SKYWALKER
 

Finally stabilizing after the disarray caused by The Last Jedi, the First Order has regained its former strength, this time under the iron fist of Kylo Ren.  At the same time, the Resistance continues to increase in power as Leia Organa and Rey train the troops for a full-force battle that will destroy the First Order for good.  Although after the last battle, most assumed that Luke Skywalker had died, reports have circulated of Luke sightings.  Rumors swirl around about his rising power, but to both the First Order and Resistance, he remains impossible to find…
 

 

Cut to dark, masked, and brooding Kylo Ren strutting aboard a refurbished Death Star ordering Storm Troopers who follow him to embark on a succeed or die mission to find and kill Luke Skywalker.  He promises that the man who finds Luke will earn the place of second in command.

After a salute from a trooper, Kylo Ren quickly retreats to an empty corridor in intense pain.  He removes his mask, clutches his chest, checks to ensure his privacy, and escapes to an unmanned ship that he flies out of the Star.  While he accelerates to lightspeed, we see flashbacks of the agony that he has undergone since murdering his father, Han Solo, and his last confrontation with Luke. 

 

He lands on the remote planet Endor that serves as an outpost for the First Order, the planet that his father would flee to when he wanted to get away.
 

Cut to focused and fiery Rey training Resistance fighters.  One fighter seems to catch her eye, and vice versa, Poe Dameron.  Fast forward to a few scenes of witty banter between laser scrimmages and an Aladdin-inspired “Whole New World” rocket ride.  The shot lands with Dameron on one knee.  Rey ecstatically accepts his proposal, but that evening, she has trouble sleeping.  She reminisces about her year of energetic, other-worldly meetings with Kylo Ren that she had vigorously suppressed.
 

The next scene begins with J. Timberlake’s “Suit and Tie” as the soundtrack for an intergalactic shopping sequence featuring Rey in a wedding dress montage cheered on by friend and fellow Resistance fighter, Rose Tico.
 

Suddenly, after Rey tries on the gown, the music stops, she looks with fright at the mirror, and collapses.
 

Back to Endor, a grizzlier Kylo Ren has created a makeshift hut and traded in his black robes for some lighter brown capes that he ties together.  He has a sense of someone else’s presence but takes the necessary precautions to camouflage himself.  Through exploring the planet, he finds what looks like the remnants of a lost civilization.  Kylo Ren discovers ancient drawings on the cave walls that picture a robot deity’s arrival along with a man and woman.  As evening comes, he continues to follow the story of the couple in what looks like a marriage ceremony.  Night falls, and he falls asleep inside the cave to dreams of his father and mother, Princess Leia, recounting their love story.  The dreams end with reflections of the moment that he killed his father with his lightsaber.  He sees and hears his mother crying his name and awakes in a cold sweat, swearing to relinquish his stay on the planet and return to his empire.  However, he has lost his way back to the ship.
 

As he searches for his ship, Kylo Ren attempts to implement the mind control that worked so well for him on the Death Star.  In a moment of weakness, he relaxes and sees Rey in a gorgeous white gown.  However, this peaceful vision lasts only for a moment; she immediately brandishes her blue lightsaber.  With reflexes quicker than lightening, he arms himself with his red one, and they stand head to head in combat position.
 

Rey swings wildly and angrily demands that Kylo Ren end the connection that he has forged with her.  He skillfully defends himself while riposting that he would, if he could.  He backs off the fight, but pursuing him deeper in the woods, Rey notices his strange clothes and disheveled appearance.  She lowers her saber and runs after him but finds herself lost in a labyrinth.  Each layer presents memories from Kylo Ren’s past until she senses his bliss after looking at her in a wedding dress.
 

Rey regains consciousness at the bridal shop, more confused and distraught than ever.  She abruptly leaves a concerned Rose and steals away for solitude, prayer, and meditation.
 

Meanwhile on the Death Star, anxiety and animosity grow among the First Order the longer that Kylo Ren prolongs his absence.  They break into two opposing factions unofficially: one that calls itself “the Loyalists” and another that starts to listen to the dictates of a powerful, black-hooded commander who assumes control in the search for Skywalker.
 

Loyalists overhear the hooded man’s directions to a few of his followers, “to find him on planet Endor.”  As a result, a few Loyalists immediately embark on a journey to the planet in order to win the honors for murdering Luke.  They find and kill a brown-hooded man in his sleep, only to turn him over and discover Kylo Ren!
 

The other faction, led by the commander, closely follows the Loyalists.  When they arrive, the commander unveils his cape and reveals his identity as Luke Skywalker, clothed in dazzling white.  The Loyalists send for reinforcements and to warn the First Order to arm the Death Star.  Ewoks resurrect from their death-like hibernation to fight beside Luke and his band of renegades.  Resistance fighters arrive, try to destabilize the Death Star in the same way that they did last time, but fail.  They next attempt to shield the planet from the Death Star’s effects, but the shield loses power as night approaches.  A small band of Resistance fighters led by Rose and Finn sneak into the Death Star to set an inward implosion but run into trouble without knowing the directions for the system.  With the help of R2-D2 who had followed them, they set the timer and manage to exit the Death Star before its demise.

 

On planet Endor, both sides suffer casualties, but led by Luke, the First Order deserters and Resistance win.
 

Alone, Rey finds Kylo Ren’s body in the carnage and weeps.  Dameron searches for Rey, and when he discovers her crying over Kylo Ren, angrily storms off.  Rey picks herself up, dries her tears, and runs after him.  They reconcile.
 

Luke reveals Rey’s parents to her: she is the daughter of the one Jedi child who had escaped Anakin’s massacre and went into hiding, where he met his wife.  Once they had Rey, they deposited her on planet Jakku before she could remember them.  As highly dangerous to the Empire and First Order, her parents were eventually sensed, hunted, and killed.
 

Rey and Dameron wed, with Ewok attendants, and embark on the normal joys and annoyances of married life.

 

Luke restores the Republic and Senate, but this time with a House of Representatives as well as more checks and balances.  The Senate elects him President, but he of course ends it after the appointed two terms.
 

My version may include more rom-com elements than the typical Star Wars movie, but how can you pass up a good wedding dress montage?  If you love Star Wars, like me, you will notice allusions to the other movies, including Rogue One, to tie everything together.  As a Matchmaker, however, I wanted to explore the connection between Kylo Ren and Rey but ultimately keep them apart; he would be a far cry from a healthy husband even if he did repent!  For more, check out my article Are You, Or Are You Dating, Darth Vader?

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